Happy minds … write happy words

Happy Minds – Reframing Emotions

Happy Minds – Reframing Emotions 

I really wanted to give you some information that you could instantly put into practice. Something that when i am working with clients with emotional issues really helps them and quickly. This is a very simple emotional reframing, its very effective and is the beginning of

Ownership and transmutation of feelings and emotions through language (c) Happy Minds 

The purpose of this is to enable you to find away out of negative emotions and begin to reframe your emotional state, through the use of ‘bridging states’ ( a bridging state is a state that opens up possibilities of change feeling manageable is one of these, there are others)

First of all it is important to understand the following :

         Mary : How are you ?
         John  : I feel sad 

When a person states how they feel they lock that state in, so in the above example when John tells Mary he feels sad, it reinforces the feeling and John is left feeling sad. Now we do this to ourselves all the time
       I feel depressed : Locks in the negative feeling of depression
       I feel bored : Locks in the feeing of boredom

Locking in emotional states : This process locks in the state by reinforcing it within the mind, what we want to do is open up the mind to the possibilities of change.

Its important to understand this, whatever we believe to be true our minds will work towards making true for us. We are going to work through an example below on how to simply reframe your emotional state and open you up to changing how you feel

     I feel depressed : this is a statement that locks in the emotional state of depression
now try adding this
    I feel manageably depressed : What is it like to feel manageably depressed ? it already feel like change can be made
    I feel manageable  : this is a small leap from feeling manageably depressed and open up the emotions to feeling something new
    I feel manageably happy : Again the leap from being manageable to being manageably happy is easy to make.
    I feel happy : now we are starting to lock in the new state ‘happy’ so we have reframed the original state ‘depressed’ to the state of ‘happy’, we can go further and add possibilities
    I feel increasingly happy : Now you open yourself up to the possibilities of feeling even more than happy.

I hope this has been easy to follow, we are taking control of our emotional state through language. It would be difficult to go from depressed to happy in one go but we use the ‘bridging’ state of ‘manageable’ to get there.

Exercise (written) 

Ask yourself how do you feel ? 
Write it down : I feel ——- (we will use the example anxious) 
now write out : I feel manageably ——- (anxious) 
Now write out : I feel manageable 
then write : I feel manageably happy (you could pick any state you wish to feel not just happy)
Then write : I feel happy 
Then write : I feel increasingly happy (increasingly is a great piece of language it opens up brighter opportunities)

Its good to write things down, writing things down locks in thoughts and emotions with actions but we can equally do this as a thought experiment.

So the steps are

1) Name and shame the emotion you wish to change
2) Add in the bridging state of ‘manageably’ to the negative emotion
3) state I feel manageable
4) I feel manageably happy (or new empowering/positive state)
5) I feel increasingly happy

You could also add in : i feel increasingly happy about —— whatever it is you want.

Fun example for my benefit and to show flexibility in process

I feel confused by this blog
I feel manageably confused by this blog
I feel manageably good about this blog (bad english yes, but it works)
I feel good when i think about this blog
I feel increasingly good when i think about this blog.

This is one of the many tools you can employ to gain Emotional mastery, its brilliant because it takes ownership of your feelings and empowers you towards change.


For more information please go to www.happy-minds.co.uk to find out how you can begin to overcome your emotional issues and feel good about who you are.

Andrew Milne


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